What the devil is The Hungry Hatter anyway?

There's a fair bit to get through, but at least you'll know why this place exists. Make yourself comfy, this could take a while.

So who are you?
Hello yourself! My name's Simon, and I'm the one you can blame for this website and pretty much everything on it. Sorry about that.

Tell me a bit about yourself.
Alright then. Well, I was born in Luton at a very early age (I was two months early actually, and it's safe to say I have never been as punctual for anything since). After picking up a handful of GCSEs, I spent a couple of years at college and picked up a BTEC National Diploma in Computer Studies, which is obviously an ideal qualification if you're looking at a career in writing. A year at Coventry University swiftly followed because it wouldn't have made sense to study in two places simultaneously, and after that it was out into the big, wide world. I survived for over a decade in the world of retail, during which I discovered a talent for writing (or, more accurately, other people liked what I wrote) and since August 2006, I've been writing things full-time and having a great time doing it too. How's that?

That'll do for now. So when did you start writing?
Well, many years ago, I worked for a record shop that will remain nameless. At the time, they had listening posts near the Singles Chart display, and on these posts we typed out mini-reviews for the songs on offer. Early in 1998, the job was given to me, and somebody must've liked it because in August that year, I was offered the post of music reviewer for Milton Keynes On Sunday. I only expected to be doing the job for a couple of weeks - just long enough for people to realise that I wasn't any good after all - but the 'paper ran with it and here we are, nearly ten years down the line and I'm still writing the music reviews (for the MK News, Milton Keynes On Sunday's successor).

Why on Earth did you put the reviews online?
Very simple. My internet provider offered me some free webspace and I wanted something to fill it with.

That's it?
Isn't that enough?

Well, no. For example, The Hungry Hatter. What's the reasoning behind the name?
I thought you'd never ask.

Don't give me that. You're writing this article in the third person. You know damn well what I'm going to ask you!
I was rather hoping you (or I) wouldn't mention that. Anyway, moving back to The Hungry Hatter... when I started this place up in February 2000, I knew naff all about HTML coding so I knew that my offering to the World Wide Web was going to be content over style, which is a nice way of saying "loads of text and virtually no pictures". A roadside restaurant on the Information Super-Highway, if you will, and I wanted a name for the site that sounded like a roadside restaurant. My first choice was The Happy Chef (a mixture of Happy Eater and Little Chef), but when I discovered a real chain of restaurants in America with that name, I had to think again and that's when the name Hungry Hatter popped into my head.

That's really almost very interesting.
You're mocking me, aren't you?

Surely you're mocking yourself.
Fair point. I bet psychiatrists would have a field day with this.

So what do you do nowadays?
Nowadays, I work for a design and marketing agency, which is much more enjoyable than it sounds. I do copy writing, proof reading, and I get paid decent money to come up with daft ideas and write them down. Some of that stuff is on this site, you know, but as I don't hold the copyright on most of those pieces (something which is not an issue with the music reviews), I have to be nice to other people if I want to put something here.

But you still submit a weekly music column to the MK News as well as all that?
Yep. Funny old world, innit?

You're telling me.
Indeed.

I bet you're so busy you haven't got time to offer your writing services to anyone else.
It's funny you should say that, but actually I am able to offer my sevices. I still have a spot of free time, you know. If you like what I've written and think I could do something for you, why not drop me an e-mail and I'll see what I can do for you. Alternatively, if you just want to get in touch to offer some constructive criticism or words of wisdom, the same address also applies. Believe it or not, I do take useful advice on board, and I've adapted some of the better pearls of wisdom into what I do. There's no point sending abuse though, those messages go straight in the Junk E-Mail folder.

Well done, that didn't look at all like a shop window announcement.
Thank you. I pride myself on my subtlety.

You done then?
Yeah, just about. I could murder a brew.

Milk, no sugar?
How did you know?

Well, I am you.
Oh yeah, well spotted.

All the words on this website and some of the pictures
©1998-2008 Simon Darnell.