OUTSTANDING

Andy Cole

You know me, I’ll listen to anything I will. Every now and again I even find something I like. Today however, I found this. Back in August 1986 a Scandinavian duo named MC Miker G and Deejay Sven managed to put Holiday Rap, the worst rap record ever by a country mile, at No.6 in the charts and single-handedly destroyed virtually all credibility that European rap music may once have had. They did a pretty good job of it too, after all, how many European rappers can you name as opposed to American ones? Exactly. So why am I telling you this? Because Andy Cole’s finished the job that G and Sven started. It’s that bad. A merely competant backing track, average backing singers and… Andy. Rapping. Sample lyric – "Andy Cole, break it down". Indeed. I feel sorry for you Manchester United supporters, having to disassociate yourselves from this. All the same, I’m glad my team doesn’t put out records (please, don’t even think about it Marvin Johnson).

1^ST MAN IN SPACE

All Seeing I

I’m really rather beginning to like the All Seeing I. Beat Goes On and Walk Like A Panther were both high-quality singles and they sounded very different from each other – how’s that for a rare sign of originality (Andy Cole)? This is just as good as both of its predecessors and for that alone I urge you, my huge and loyal army of readers (Readership up by 50%! I now have three!), to go out and nip into your local record shop when it comes out. It sounds a bit early eighties but it scores points when Phil Oakey starts singing about some bloke from Sheffield who goes up into space. It’s worth buying purely for the line "Darling, come quickly, I can see my house from here".