RAPTURE RIDERS

Blondie vs the Doors

When somebody takes an old song and tries merging it with some new tune they’ve created, the end result is usually a bit rubbish. Not always, there is the odd exception, but usually. However, when somebody takes two old songs and chucks them together, the hit to miss ratio is normally far more favourable. Freak Like Me (especially the original Soulwax version) is a handy example for me to show to you, so here it is. There are others too, David Bowie’s Rebel Never Gets Old was a badly underappreciated example of how it should be done and even Richard X’s Finest Dreams was quality. Obviously, it can also go horribly wrong, but let’s stick to the ones where it comes together shall we? Ah go on, let’s start the week with a happy review. I’m sure you can wait a couple of paragraphs before I start having a moan at the state of music today, after all, you know it’s going to happen before we hit the bottom of the page. Not during this review though, sunshine, and I’ll tell you why. Because this is awesome. It’s so well done that if you don’t listen to it with a great big stupid grin plastered across your face, then I feel sorry for you, I really do. Anyone who knows their music and X-Factor contestants will probably have guessed that this six-minute gem is an amicable partnership between Blondie’s Rapture and the Doors’ Riders On The Storm, but it’s not quite as simple as you think it is. It’s not just a case of ripping out Debbie Harry’s contribution and slotting in Jim Morrison’s lines instead you know, there’s an art to this. As you might expect, Jim’s doing most of the singing, but the tune’s been played about with and beefed up and certainly doesn’t sound 26 years old like it ought to. Class. I’m even going to let it off for keeping in La Harry’s bonkers monologue about getting eaten by aliens and then going out and eating cars. Do you know, now I think of it, I’d love it if Shayne Ward covered Rapture. Please let it happen, I want to hear that.

BOYFRIEND

Ashlee Simpson

“Hey, how long ’til the music drowns you out?” asks Ashlee Simpson early on. Ooh, until the chorus kicks in and your voice gets lost amongst the cacophony, I’d say. Glad I could help. The annoying thing is, I actually rather like the tune. I know it’s pop-rock, I know it was probably created by some faceless committee at her record company, and I know it’s radio-friendly, I just… like it. And do you know what? I’m not going to apologise for that either. So there. It’s just a shame that Ms Simpson’s voice isn’t quite capable of holding its own against all the guitars once they come galloping in. Still, she’s given it a go and I’m sure she’d have kicked herself if she hadn’t.

WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN

Arctic Monkeys

Practically the entire music press have pounced on this band’s music like a randy dog on a cuddly toy, and they’re absolutely right to do so (for a change). I wasn’t very hopeful to begin with, mind, because this one starts off a bit quiet and melancholy. For the first few bars I thought I was listening to a Libertines knock-off, which isn’t a good thing really as I didn’t think much of them. What kept me interested was the fact that the song had a story to tell, a good one too, all about prostitution and stuff (you might not see this on Ministry of Mayhem then), so that when the song really came to life that was just the icing on the cake. If they can keep this up, this band has so much potential it’s frightening. I can’t wait to hear the album, but in the meantime if this doesn’t give them their second Number One, quite frankly I’m going to be a little bit annoyed. And if you’re still waiting for the unfavourable review that I always sneak in, then I bet you’re disappointed. Cheerio!