IF TOMORROW NEVER COMES

Ronan Keating

Oh dear God, he's finally become the Serious Musician he's always wanted to be. Everything is planned with military precision, the drums kick in at exactly the right time, the heartfelt singing is right on the money and there's also room for one of those strange twangy noises that a guitar hasn't made since Paul Young was famous (kids, ask your parents, I'm not telling you who Paul Young was). The problem is that the most notable thing about this song is the number of times you'll catch yourself looking at your watch waiting for the wretched thing to end. There's absolutely no fun or enjoyment to be had out of this song whatsoever, so you might as well spend the money on an extra lottery ticket or something. Just so long as this isn't a big hit, that's what matters.

LAZY

X-Press 2 featuring David Byrne

This is annoying. Somebody told me this was going to be massive about a month ago, so I had a listen and thought it was OK, but nothing special. I was then politely informed that this song was a grower and I politely informed said person that I doubted that. Good job I didn't review this a month earlier then, really. It is a grower (damn) and it is going to be massive (damn again). It's a house tune, but don't worry those of you over 30, it's also a proper song. It's rather mellow and very summery, just the sort of thing to tide you over until the next football season starts. As for being special, well, you can recall how it goes a couple of minutes after it's finished. These days, I'd say that's pretty special.