CAN WE FIX IT?

Bob The Builder

Has British music really come to this? Have we really sunk from the Beatles vs the Rolling Stones to the Tweenies vs Bob The Builder? There is another way of looking at this, however and it's this. Has Neil Morrissey's career really come to this? Has he really sunk from the dizzy heights of Men Behaving Badly to the murky subterranean depths that is singing on a kid's party tune? If this is what can happen to you, remind me never to get on the wrong side of Les Dennis. As tunes go, Can We Fix It? fills a gap in the market that previously had never needed filling, namely Stadium Pop. More of a horror than Stadium Rock will ever be (namely because the style of music nurtures the little ones ready for big hair and wailing guitars from a very early age), it's a real wave-your-hands-in-the-air affair and Neil's enjoying himself, which is nice. Kids and students will find this single will sit snugly next to their Tweenies single (both bought for very different reasons depending on the age group), but I honestly can't work out why this single exists as far as everyone else is concerned.

The Best Songs Of The Millennium II

BRING ME SUNSHINE

Morecambe & Wise

Was this ever a single? Frankly, I don't care. The most genuinely jolly song ever from the funniest comedians ever (just squeaking past Laurel & Hardy and lapping Cannon & Ball many times over) – can't really go wrong, can it? And it doesn't. Nearly every single week they ended their show with this before dancing off into the distance, bless 'em and despite the fact that one of their Christmas shows is repeated every single year (either the one with Elton John falling out of a building or the one with Shirley Bassey and the smoke machines, the BBC don't seem to recall there were others) it's a song that doesn't fade with the passing of time (or the passing of its singers for that matter). Classic, no other word for it.

The Worst Songs Of The Millennium II

SWEAR IT AGAIN
IF I LET YOU GO
FLYING WITHOUT WINGS
I HAVE A DREAM / SEASONS IN THE SUN
FOOL AGAIN
AGAINST ALL ODDS
MY LOVE

Westlife

I've never put a band's entire back catalogue in before, but there's always a first time for everything. The problem I have is that every song they put out sounds like everything else they've done before. Just to put the tin hat on it, they've turned a song about a bloke about to top himself (Seasons In The Sun) into an appalling sickly ballad! If they'd only try something different once in a while, I'd have no problem with that, but their singles have been so cynically marketed towards the masses it beggars belief. Oh yes, nearly forgot, both their albums can go in and all.